Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Ryuu's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, June 19th, 2007
10:23 am	Life to the extent It is rather ironic that the harder i try to do things, in my job, the more i seem to be getting introuble and told that i cant comply with what is going on. It just leads me to believe that the thought of actually trying in this world is pointless and i should just make a solid connection with someone that is rather powerful in the political standings so that i can fuck up all i want and just have it covered up for me like any sucssful person in this world. Having friends, is a pointless endevor, compared to minipulating the system to get your way. To the simple fact that friends never really turn out to be friends at all and the only thing they are there for is to look for a way to turn you into a potential gain. Dont believe me look at a situation. 95% of people are eaisly swayed. When the going gets tough and things come down on them they either rely on their looks to get them out of the trouble or if that dont work they turn the blame toward another. So in any event, how does it feel to know that your "Best Friend" will most likly turn around and plant a 6inch knife stright between your shoulder blades the day after you risked your (life, job ect) for them. Current Mood: aggravated Current Music: Aganist the Grain- Bad religion (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, February 13th, 2007
12:36 pm	New Beginings Things are starting to change in my life and most likly for the better. I am actually in a rather good mood for once in my life. People are effecting my life, and well yea its for the better. I wont be taking leave till july this year and it will only be like for 15 20 days but well thats a break from work. I will miss my friends, but atleast i will get to see older frineds. In any event i am happier in my life then i have been, in like 10 years so things are going rather well. Its great to know that there possible was a plan in my life to keep me moody and depressed for most of my life if it was to turn out like this. ^_^ (Comment on this)
Saturday, September 2nd, 2006
9:25 am	Fag of an ARMY So yea the gay ass army is trying to keep me here in korea. What a bunch of bull that is i get nominated to go to a prestigous assignment and now they are trying to screw me out of it. But seriously i think i should get out on being gay. And i only mean that in the sense that the army turned me gay. First there was basic where i got to shower in open stalls with a bunch of guys. (1am showers when everyone is asleep is your friend) and right now i am in this unit with 30 people, of 30 people there are all of 2 girls. SO yea way way to many guys. So i blame any sexual mixups i have on the army cause its fun that way. In any event. i am still trying to see if i am going to beable to go to Virgina cause the army is being its fun old self and trying to bend me over and screw me. Ok i done, but on a lighter note i have desided that i will be going as the great and powerful KUJA to my next con Current Mood: pissed off (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 31st, 2006
3:50 am	Anime Conventions So i have, desided what i am going to be for the next con i go to, well its between 2 so i am taking a poll basicly. I am either going to go as the bishoneun of the final fantasy world KUJA or as the cute singer from gravitation Suchi ^_^ in his singing outfit. Another words short tight leather shorts a mid top and a long yellow coat ^_^ so ya all let me know what you think (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, August 21st, 2006
3:15 am	Termoil The question i present is what his the point of a friend or close relationship. It is a simple fact that the closer you get to someone the more they can hurt you when they betray you. So what is the point of being happy and cheerie around someone. So you can make a friend and 6months a year down the road they can do something totally screwed up and basicly for lack of a better way of putting it cut you to the quiver. If i let my self get close to people that it only is an envitable about of time before they screw me over. Bickering leads to fights, which leads to not talking to the other. So in theory its better to not make friends in the first place cause they are only going to piss you off in the end. I was told today that i have a double standard for people and my self. Cause is something is bothering someone else i want to know whats wrong and try to help them. But if its the reverse situation and someone asks me whats wrong i just blow them off, and basicly just glare at them, thus walking off. This is true in many aspects. Mostly cause i dont want others to suffer the road i have chosen for my self. I really cant stand to see others upset or bothered. Be me myself i dont trust others enough to let them into help me. This may sound selfish but i really cant stand people and i have a few good reasons not to. But in anyevent group events just piss me off. And i am told in the right situation that i am very person friendly. Thus the people that say this dont know me very well, and once they do will realize that i am putting on a facade for the people around me so that i dont bring the mood down. I realize i cant do this 24/7 so it has basicly come to a revilation tat i really cant do the whole people thing. Thus i have desided that i will mostly stay indoors as much as possible. This way i can be my "brooding self" and not bother others. Friends are an illusion/figment of peoples minds for the simple fact that people do not do things out of the kindness of their hearts. It is more that if i do this for you, then you will owe me one in the future. No person is nice enough to do something with out something being expected in return. Weather its big or small people really are just evil beings used to minuplate others as much as they can weather the realise it or not. With that said i would like to get others thoughts on this and see where i stand in the publics eyes. Current Mood: So sue Me (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, August 18th, 2006
1:01 pm	Lucky star So the really question is was i actually born under a lucky star. So lets see the first time i extended my stay in korea, i gave up the chance to be an instructor at fort polk. Now second time comes around and i am nominated to go work in arlington virginia. I dont think i can pass up an oppertunity like this. This basicly means that i will be 12 hours from my family so on 4 day weekends i can just drive home and visit for 3 days. Not to mention i might possible getting off post housing. This to me is great, mainly cause it means that i might beable to get one of my friends to come live with me in virginia. Unfortunaltly it seems that Virgo, is not happy with the fact that i will most likly be back in the states some time soon. Maybe she really does hate me but whatever. In any event i know that taren reads this and i just wanted him to know that i could possible come visit him at RPI during his school year since i wouldnt be that far away. So as fate would seem i have hit 2 lucky stations in a row so instead of passing up this blessing and praying for another good station i think i will just take this one. In anyevent my WoW is as addicting and i have a group i mainly hang with cause the people i joined to play with just arnt there in my time of need. Although remi has come though in a clinch more then a few times for me. In anycase i just had a raid with like 6 of my friends taking down level 55 aliance and down although this one level 6 warrior came through and riped all 6 of us apart in 12 hits. Thats 2 hits each EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. Current Mood: apathetic (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 8th, 2006
9:37 am	WoW So yea leveling has been a breeze, i have either grinned or used quests to get about 3 to 4 levels a day even though the 20's, but now here in lies the flaw. I hit 28 and had to spend and entire day workin got make 29 cause the alliance whores dont know how to fight perople their own level they have to bother people that are in the middle of quests and 20 levels ore more below them cause they need to compensate for something. MY reply to this is PAY BACK IS A BITCH Current Mood: exhausted (Comment on this)
Friday, July 28th, 2006
10:48 am	Waiting Well virgo is about to sell her soul, and join WoW just like the rest of us have done. But now i have to wait. I am leveling my hunter right now but when the new update comes brining forth the BLOOD ELF i will have to start from level one again cause that is the race i want to be. o well its fun and i can have my higher level friends tank me (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, June 11th, 2006
12:45 pm	SUBJECT So i couldnt think of a subject, but i am in a rather good mood at this point in time. One for the simple fact that i come home in 11 days. Second of all i just for the first time passed turkey march with a C on hard ^_^. To some this is no feat but i was happy as hell. To top it all off i went doubles sync with a korean and actually out danced him. Although was we did do together we drew about a 30 person crowd. Out side pump-it-up machines rock. OK ok well i am done for now and i have to start packing to go home not to mention purchesing my new cpu ^_^ so damn powerful. Current Mood: cynical Current Music: Wait and bleed (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, June 8th, 2006
12:52 pm	Time It is ammusing to me that people actually thing i ran, from something and thats how i ended up in korea. Trust me if i had a choice in the matter i would not have been shipped off to korea, although in the longrun it seems to have been for the better. I cant complain about the money i get while i am over here, only about the little things i hate about the army. In any event i live with 37 people for the most part although we do get seperate rooms. A lot of the time i want them to just vanish, but when worst comes to worse most of them, who i wouldnt even think new i was around are there to aid me. Now this is just how life works. People are stupid cruel, and for the most part evil. When it really comes down to it though they will be there for you. Or atlest this is what i have come to learn. "tarenwanderer" just to clarify something, i dont run away, espically half way around the world. Nothing in my life was as bad as that that i would have to, not to mention i dont get to see any of my close friends anymore. Now weather or not i actually still have friends in the states is to be determined, and i will most likly see where they and i stand at this point in time when i come home on leave in 2 weeks. As of right now i am not even sure that i am giogn to want to spend time with most of them cause, well they seem so caught up in personal drama that i really dont want to be brought into it or make it worse. Sure enough i will be going to CT con i might try and drop mike a line if he is talking to me. (mean that as more of a gets his ars off WoW) hopfully not the other way around. In any event it really does seem as if time has brought a great rift between me and what i considered my few friends. Hard to say but only time will tell where i actually stand with some people, people that i thought i could call my friends. Things like this make me wonder about my judge of character, but on the other hand if its not ment to be then it just wont be. This is what i have learned in my life and it has held true to this day. Weather its god that desideds fate, or not there is always something that you are ment to do with your life. Well most who read this will think i am way off, but again i really dont care about what others think cause if i did, then i would have never done half the things i have with my life. Including some of the best like going bungee jumping. Current Mood: 8 hour classes bore me (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 2nd, 2006
10:37 am	Yummy, well yea so i finallly got to the ending of kingdom hearts 2 (in english). I didnt beat like half the worlds and used anti form 32 times but well heh. Yea so um can i wrap riku up and take him to a privte area. And seriously with that ending how can anyone possible say that sora and riku are stright. (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 20th, 2006
2:09 pm	FFXI, WoW, LineageII, ect... all these games bored me in a month or less, maybe lasted 2 months. So now i have DDO which i wasnt to sure about when i first got it but now that i have it i cant put it down. The game encorperates most of the D&D rules and i cant find to many flaws with it. So in this case i would have to say that this is the best mmorpg i have ever played. ^_^ (Comment on this)
Monday, April 17th, 2006
2:58 pm	random stuff at work 1. Zidane (ff9) (sorry 9 rocks) 2. Kawaru Nagasi (evangelion) 3. Gau (FF6) 4. Alucard (SOTN) 5. Wolfram (kyo kara maou) 6. Chip (guilty gear2) 7. Zero (Mega man x4) (zero in black armor = win) 8. Shadow (Thinks its Shadows adventures) 9. Riku (Kingdom Hearts II) 10. Sasuke (naruto) (dont like it tough) 11. Gau (Shadow skill) 12. Katt (breath of fire 2) 01. Who would make a better college professor, 6 or 11? What subjects would they teach? If its on martial arts gau. As for chip ehhh, no clue. 02. Do you think 4 is hot? How hot? Tall dark platnium hair. O hell yes 03. 12 sends 8 on a mission. What is it, and does it succeed? Assumes katt is infused with the light and dark crystal to make her evil, so she sends shadow to blow up a town. Shadow not succeed, dont make me laugh. 04. What is or would be 9's favorite book? Gau, uhhhh ..... 05. Would it make more sense for 2 to swear fealty to 6, or the other way around? Lets see the 17th angel bowing down or chip... I dont forsee either doing so. 06. For some reason, 5 is looking for a roommate. Should s/he share a studio apartment with 9 or with 10? Would have to say wolfram and sasuke, so the conversations would be hn... and move, that would work right? 07. 2, 7 and 12 have dinner together. Where do they go, and what do they discuss? Good (well i see him as good) evil and a reploid, well um errr, do they really have to get together? 08. 3 challenges 10 to a duel. What happens? Well i would have to say neither gets anywhere cause they can both copy each other. God what a mirror match lol. 09. If 1 stole 8's most precious possession, how would s/he get it back? Um i really dont think shadow would get what ever zidane stole back. Lets face it its zidane. 10. Suggest a title for a story in which 7 and 12 both attain what they most desire. "back in black" "golden haired duo" (that would just be a scarry story) 11. What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted 4 and 1 to work together? Something worth a lot, that dracula cursed?.... 12. If 7 visited you for the weekend, how would you get along? Fine, as long as he didnt get mad at me looking at his wiring? 13. If you could command 3 to perform any one task or service for you, what would it be? Would have to say, um...Bodyguard. (promises to give him a shiny on the side) 14. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 11? No, but it would be intresting 15. If 2 had to choose sides between 4 and 5, which would it be? Kawaru is bringing and end to man any way ^_^ 16. What might 10 shout while charging into battle? Not a damn thing he hates talking. 17. If you chose a song to represent 8, which song would you choose? He got his own game i sure as hell bet he has his own song 18. 1, 6 and 12 are having dim sum at a Chinese restaurant. There is only one scallion pancake left, and they all reach for it at the same time. Who gets to eat it? Zidane, duh!!! Thief in the house ^_^ 19. What might be a good pick-up line for 2 to use on 10? I love you? Seemed to work on shinji ^_^ 20. What would 5 most likely be arrested for? Burning the first one that touched yurri to a crisp. (they are engaged after all) 21. What is 6's secret? He is not as fast as he thinks he is 22. If 11 and 9 were racing to a destination, who would get there first? Are they allowed to use skills? 23. 3 and 7 tell conflicting versions of events. Which is more reliable? Zero's he has no reason to lie. Not to mention gau can be influnced with shiny things. 24. 1 and 9 reluctantly team up to save the world from the threat posed by 4's sinister secret organization. 11 volunteers to help them, but it is later discovered that 11 is actually a spy for 4. Meanwhile, 4 has kidnapped 12 in an attempt to force their surrender. Following the wise advice of 5, they seek out 3, who gives them what they need to complete their quest. What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it. That is to much to remember to even think about it. 25. If you had to walk home through a bad neighbourhood late at night, would you feel safer in the company of 7 or 8? Hum, a 7 foot reploid with a beam saber or a spiky black hedgehog with a plythra of guns? i think i feel safe with either. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, March 6th, 2006
1:35 pm	EVIl You Are 80% Evil You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot. How Evil Are You? (Comment on this)
Monday, December 19th, 2005
7:25 am	SO YEA Well i know RENT, yes its a moive/musical, not to mention i own narnia, the lion witch and the woredrobe ^_^ weee spelling. Anyway yes i own them both just days after inthearter and they are good coppies. See korea is good for something. Rent is rather amusing and well yea Narnia is just good period although again the book far superseeds it. anyway i have .hack 2 and 3 now so i have more obsession to play with along with my other 50 games sighs. Really i dont think that i should be playing 8 rpgs offline and 2 online at one time do you.? (Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 8th, 2005
4:39 pm	i so swav You scored as James Bond, Agent 007. James Bond is MI6's best agent, a suave, sophisticated super spy with charm, cunning, and a license's to kill. He doesn't care about rules or regulations and somewhat amoral. He does care about saving humanity though, as well as the beautiful women who fill his world. Bond has expensive tastes, a wide knowledge of many subjects, and his usually armed with a clever gadget and an appropriate one-liner. </td> James Bond, Agent 007 88% Captain Jack Sparrow 83% El Zorro 63% Indiana Jones 50% Lara Croft 50% Neo, the "One" 46% Batman, the Dark Knight 46% The Amazing Spider-Man 38% Maximus 33% The Terminator 33% William Wallace 25% Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0 created with QuizFarm.com (Comment on this)
Friday, October 21st, 2005
4:23 pm	Judgement I pass judgement on those who i thought were my friends now. Virgo ona-chan -Pass Remi-san - Pass Chris- Fail Nick-fail Tetsu- Pass Jadie - Not sure Star - Lost Valkarth - Pass Rincon - pass Flamer - (hey he is a shaman he can have a funny name) Pass Mura - Pass Inc - Pass Dave - ?? Taren - Pass Vicious - His call Current Mood: stressed (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, October 9th, 2005
1:04 pm	Just Wow Last night was one of my best nights in my life. Russian dancers are fucking hot as hell, and i had the privlage to be in this persons line of sight. So i guess i dont look to bad after all. Hoping to get to see them again, although it was hard to comunicete cause they only new about 20 english words and kept saying things to me in russian lol. So i guess the only thing for me to do is to learn russian. (Comment on this)
Saturday, October 1st, 2005
1:32 pm	Life So what is to say that i am totally right in the head. For all of you that actually know me, would most likely say that i am not. thanks for the support ^_^. But really what am i doing in the army, never the less korea. I mean i take some college courses, like it is supposed to make up for something. When i get upset i just drink, and let me tell you that is not a damn problem solver. I mean my body looks a little better since i came here, but that is the only plus. I drink, Smoke (only when drinking) and i have a really weird social life. I would say that except for the simple fact that i dont actually have to find a place to live, cause the army so graciously gives me Five Star rooming (dies from lying to much) and i dont have to pay a water or electric bill, i would sooner die then stay in this god forsaken world. Although one other good thing is that i have come to the realization that if i killed my self. One i would be making a lot of people cry, and when they eventually did pass away their sprits would come kick the shit out of me in the after world for being so stupid. I really think i should just stop doing anything sit in my room, and play RO all my time off and become a lazy gamer once again. Although i dont know how this solves anything, it seems to solve everything at the same time. Well i am done ranting, so sorry to have wasted all your time with this worthless post but i felt the need to put in down in writting somewhere. Current Mood: Think Think Think Current Music: Wait and Bleed "Slipknot" (Comment on this)
Thursday, September 22nd, 2005
2:45 pm	Which do you think fits me more? Positive: Traditionally, The Devil represents the basest of mans desires and ultimately he stands as the one in which all the blame of the worlds evils are habitually placed. While it is easier for us to place blame on someone or something else, Justice, Temperance, and Judgment assure us that we are responsible for our own actions whether good or bad. The Devil card represents exploring the physical world and indulging in life’s physical pleasures. The Devil card suggests both the possibilities and limitations of the physical and ultimately leads one to a change into the spiritual. Without knowledge and understanding of the physical, one could never find the experience needed to make a transformation into a higher spiritual awareness. The Devil stands for exploration of the world around us without taking responsibility for our actions. Ironically, those who place blame solely on the devil represent exactly what this card stands for. Negative: In a reversed position this card represents freedom from the physical desires of the world, a mindset of spiritual over physical, and the acceptance and responsibility for ones own actions. Positive: The Moon represents the ever-changing moods and cycles of life. The Moon is closely related to the feminine aspect as well as the tides of the ocean. What one tide brings in may have little impact on us, while another may bring significant change and enlightenment. The moon works strongly with inner intuition which has a subtle influence on our everyday lives. The Moon always has an affect on life as many lives are attuned directly to the cycles that the moon presents. Farmers planting rituals are attuned to the moon, women’s menstrual cycles are also attuned to a monthly timeline like that of the moon, and the tides are largely affected on a cyclic nature. While the Moon is subtle and inconsistent, it has one constant and that is of cycles. The Moon reinforces that life refreshes and rejuvenates through the use of cycles and the more we attune to nature the more prosperous we can become. Negative: In a reversed position this card represents direct and analytic thinking. Ones vulnerabilities are outward and apparent and need to be concealed more heavily. Disrupted cycles or a possible pregnancy. (Comment on this)